Hello!? Can anyone relate?!
I could possibly begin to catch arthritis from remaining in the same position typing away at this topic! I’m going to break this down in separate posts if you all are interested!
18 years old, decided to get MARRIED and willingly leave anything else behind. Or was I? Marriage is hard, everyone knows that. I had known him since I was 12, and no matter what SIGNS were screaming in my face to get the hell away, I stayed and committed my life to this guy. Can you say stupid one time? K, thanks. Let me keep it real with you though. I came from a broken home, where love, and having a COMPLETE family has always been one of my many aspirations. With already giving life to 2 beautiful baby girls by this time, I felt I had nothing else to lose, and this was the “right” choice to make, after all, he is the father to them and they deserve a family unit. EH! Number 1 mistake right there. LADIES, one more time, LADIES! DO NOT stay with a man JUST because you have CHILDREN with them! (Hitting my forehead right now)
Within 2 weeks of being married, I discovered he was ALREADY cheating on me! Who am I kidding, he was still a kid, wanting to explore and see what other fish were in the sea, but didn’t want to let go of a prized possession, just in case other things didn’t work out. In disbelief, and my mother just recently being deported (yep, both of my parents got deported at separate times) all I could do was cry. I had turned my back on my family because they didn’t see that I felt I was making the right decision to keep my family together, so I had no one to run to when times got hard. AND THEY GOT HARD.
I forgave him. Of course, you knew that was coming, right? I mean, c’mon, cut the guy some slack, he only cheated on me once and we had just gotten married. No biggie. Haha! Years flew by, 6 years to be exact. And guess what? Things never changed, in fact, they had only gotten worse. After constant cheating, lying, betrayals, mistrust, I gained weight and I was depressed with my life. I was working full-time and till this day I remember working 26 days straight picking up overtime to help pay the bills because ladies, the guy could barely manage to keep a job when he got one!
I figured staying, reassurance that change would occur, marriage counseling through church would fix my marriage, but the reality of it is that it was broken from the moment it started. I went in for all of the wrong reasons, and unfortunately in those times of my life, I did not have a mentor. I did not have someone that could advise me over marriage, or what to look for in a MAN, and what I myself am supposed to bring to the table.
Would you like to hear the end and learn more about this? Let me know and I will create another blog post!
How do you feel about this? Tell me, would you have stuck around, or left a long time ago? I’m interested in everyone’s thoughts.
Weigh in! Comment and let me know!